On my very first blog post I hinted at revealing some of my troll activities. Well here is a hint at one of my trolling expeditions. Tired of bitches, cunts and whores that thought they were princesses (40 year old single mothers are not fucking princesses) I decided to post a dating profile that showed my true feelings when it comes to online dating.
ME:
I am a smart, nice, and funny man in my 30's. I have no ex-wife or children. I honestly am to good for you. I can cook better than you can, and I can fix the things that you break. I have a cool job; when I tell people what I do as a profession they usually gasp "WOW, that is SO cool!" Unfortunately if doesn't pay so well and I am subject to be laid off in this crappy economy. If you have any kind of a sense of humor you should find me amusing, several of my friends tell me I am one of their favorite things on facebook and one of my friends (a woman my age,by the way)told me that she thinks I am as funny as Danial Tosh from Tosh.0, and that I should be a comedian. I am intelligent and can carry a conversation on topics as wide as policits, society, cultures and even particle physics. Can you do that? Oh, did I mention that I have a great dick? It has been described as "big" and "the perfect size" of length and thickness by almost every woman that has been lucky enough to sleep with me as I have a nice one AND I know how to use it, along with my fingers and toys I might add. In fact the last four that I have dated wished to continue "seeing each other" after we decided not to date anymore. But don't worry as I wont be pulling a Sen. Wiener and sending you any pictures.
You:
Are most likely a crazy bitch. You are probably on the lowest level as attractive, and use pictures on your profile from 5 years ago when you weren't so haggard looking, or so chubby. You are also probably divorced and have children, multiple children at that. You will use them as a reason to to hardly ever date. You "think" that your going back to school in a few years, but never will. Probably after 2 or 3 dates you will decide to mysteriously disapear, as you will close your POF profile, stop answering calls and go back to where ever or whatever spawned you in the first place. We will probably never sleep together as you prefer to get free stuff,and not action. So sad that you will never discover my wonderful cock. Nor will I ever discover how you have no oral skills, act confused and epileptic during cowgirl, or how disgusting your vagina smells. Come to think about it, it's probably for the best.
Date:
How about we go out for a nice dinner, I spend all my unemployment money or waste 2-3 hours of work at my rewarding but poverty inducing job, so that you can have a free meal? The night will culminate in you not kissing me goodnight, and then me masturbating to pornography involving women hotter than I could have ever hoped you would be! The next day I will email you or call to see if you'd like to go out again, but since your a fucking bitch I will never hear from you again.
Yup. That's right. I posted that on Plentyoffish and not surprisingly it got reported and soon deleted. But what was even more surprising, is that I posted as the profile picture, some attractive shirtless moron picking tree blooms, because of that I got a lot of emails from women who were honestly too stupid to realize it was fake.
They were blinded by the pretty picture and wanted to know why I was so hostile. What a buch of stupid bitches. Well, that concludes this post. Lets see if I get any hate mail.
I am actually slightly more attractive than this |
ME:
I am a smart, nice, and funny man in my 30's. I have no ex-wife or children. I honestly am to good for you. I can cook better than you can, and I can fix the things that you break. I have a cool job; when I tell people what I do as a profession they usually gasp "WOW, that is SO cool!" Unfortunately if doesn't pay so well and I am subject to be laid off in this crappy economy. If you have any kind of a sense of humor you should find me amusing, several of my friends tell me I am one of their favorite things on facebook and one of my friends (a woman my age,by the way)told me that she thinks I am as funny as Danial Tosh from Tosh.0, and that I should be a comedian. I am intelligent and can carry a conversation on topics as wide as policits, society, cultures and even particle physics. Can you do that? Oh, did I mention that I have a great dick? It has been described as "big" and "the perfect size" of length and thickness by almost every woman that has been lucky enough to sleep with me as I have a nice one AND I know how to use it, along with my fingers and toys I might add. In fact the last four that I have dated wished to continue "seeing each other" after we decided not to date anymore. But don't worry as I wont be pulling a Sen. Wiener and sending you any pictures.
Jesus is the only man that will ever love you. |
Are most likely a crazy bitch. You are probably on the lowest level as attractive, and use pictures on your profile from 5 years ago when you weren't so haggard looking, or so chubby. You are also probably divorced and have children, multiple children at that. You will use them as a reason to to hardly ever date. You "think" that your going back to school in a few years, but never will. Probably after 2 or 3 dates you will decide to mysteriously disapear, as you will close your POF profile, stop answering calls and go back to where ever or whatever spawned you in the first place. We will probably never sleep together as you prefer to get free stuff,and not action. So sad that you will never discover my wonderful cock. Nor will I ever discover how you have no oral skills, act confused and epileptic during cowgirl, or how disgusting your vagina smells. Come to think about it, it's probably for the best.
You are a... |
How about we go out for a nice dinner, I spend all my unemployment money or waste 2-3 hours of work at my rewarding but poverty inducing job, so that you can have a free meal? The night will culminate in you not kissing me goodnight, and then me masturbating to pornography involving women hotter than I could have ever hoped you would be! The next day I will email you or call to see if you'd like to go out again, but since your a fucking bitch I will never hear from you again.
Yup. That's right. I posted that on Plentyoffish and not surprisingly it got reported and soon deleted. But what was even more surprising, is that I posted as the profile picture, some attractive shirtless moron picking tree blooms, because of that I got a lot of emails from women who were honestly too stupid to realize it was fake.
They were blinded by the pretty picture and wanted to know why I was so hostile. What a buch of stupid bitches. Well, that concludes this post. Lets see if I get any hate mail.
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