I am sorry old friend. We both knew that when I moved you were staying. Honestly I should have thrown you away a long time ago. I mean...you're 31 years old. That is a VERY long life in couch years.
I first met you in the Water Front Mission Thrift Store in Crestview, Florida. I bought you and put you on the truck to go in my living room in my very first (and only) house that I've owned. You were so long I was afraid you would fall off the back of the S-10, but you made it. I got another couch and it was more comfy to sit on. But you were my napping couch. Sunday afternoon, NASCAR on the TV and me asleep on you...good times.
I even slept on you until I replaced my bed. Several guests slept on you in Florida and and Atlanta. Max my dog enjoyed sleeping on you as well.
You suffered from the move to Atlanta, and over time your ends got loose and the center collapsed, later your back blew out. I decided to try to fix you last year but soon realized I would have to completely take you apart. I decided against that. But I did find a build sheet...your birth certificate if you will. You were made on 8-8-1980.
During our time together you supported me.
I wacked off on you countless times, I made out with several chicks on you and there was that night me and the chick with the awesome big titties did it on you...damn I miss those titties. They were so fucking awesome. Her not so much but those titties...Jesus.
Well, you are now out at the dumpster...and a few of your cushions are outside the door. Earlier tonight I moved you and one end came apart. It made the decision easy. As I pushed you down the stairs and dragged you out of the building you left a trail of parts. I am sorry I had to drag you thru the grass and to uh...you know...cut that hole in the side of you, so I could drag you easier.
I know it wasn't an easy end, and it isn't over for you. I doubt anyone will take you back to their apartment. You will probably sit for a couple of weeks until you are taken to the trash. Perhaps you will be incinerated. Who knows. I am sort of sad...kinda...not really...but I WILL remember you. I will always tell people about the 30 year old couch that I dragged across 3 states. Sorry we couldn't make it four.
I first met you in the Water Front Mission Thrift Store in Crestview, Florida. I bought you and put you on the truck to go in my living room in my very first (and only) house that I've owned. You were so long I was afraid you would fall off the back of the S-10, but you made it. I got another couch and it was more comfy to sit on. But you were my napping couch. Sunday afternoon, NASCAR on the TV and me asleep on you...good times.
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| My couch |
When I had to sell the house due to overwhelming poverty you went with me. You made the journey to Troy Alabama where you suffered thru storage for 2 years. Then you accompanied me to Atlanta. Me dragging you up the stairs by myself didn't suit you very well.Several women insulted you but you lasted longer than all of them...hell...you're older than most of them too!
I even slept on you until I replaced my bed. Several guests slept on you in Florida and and Atlanta. Max my dog enjoyed sleeping on you as well.
You suffered from the move to Atlanta, and over time your ends got loose and the center collapsed, later your back blew out. I decided to try to fix you last year but soon realized I would have to completely take you apart. I decided against that. But I did find a build sheet...your birth certificate if you will. You were made on 8-8-1980.
During our time together you supported me.
I wacked off on you countless times, I made out with several chicks on you and there was that night me and the chick with the awesome big titties did it on you...damn I miss those titties. They were so fucking awesome. Her not so much but those titties...Jesus.
Well, you are now out at the dumpster...and a few of your cushions are outside the door. Earlier tonight I moved you and one end came apart. It made the decision easy. As I pushed you down the stairs and dragged you out of the building you left a trail of parts. I am sorry I had to drag you thru the grass and to uh...you know...cut that hole in the side of you, so I could drag you easier.
Max (RIP) napping on the couch
I know it wasn't an easy end, and it isn't over for you. I doubt anyone will take you back to their apartment. You will probably sit for a couple of weeks until you are taken to the trash. Perhaps you will be incinerated. Who knows. I am sort of sad...kinda...not really...but I WILL remember you. I will always tell people about the 30 year old couch that I dragged across 3 states. Sorry we couldn't make it four.
My couch
Max (RIP) napping on the couch
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