I Am A Whiny Bitch Because Superman Is Too Realistic.

"Hold me to your bosom."

Dear Comic Book fanboys:

I am so fucking tired of you whining about how super heroes are supposed to be super-fucking-awesome-happy -good-guy-heroes like the propaganda that they were in the 1950's. Guess what. It's not 1950. Shit wasn't realistic then, not now.

Iron man is supposed to be a drunken asshole. Is he a drunken ass hole in the movies? Do I complain about that? Noooo. Because guess what. Having a drunken driver of a Iron Man jet suit is bad for kids. So shut the fuck up about Superman not being 1950's propaganda.

We have *hick* a hulk... but *hick* I'd trade him for ah Bourbon.  

He's a fucking adopted orphan. His planet, along with all of his family was obliterated like Alderaan, and he is a fucking God on this planet. His best friend becomes his greatest enemy, The internet killed journalism and newspapers so he is fucking unemployed, and he is fucking allergic to intergalactic chunks of his home planet. Not to mention he hangs out in a fucking crystal cave to get away from people. He has some fucking issues. Get over it. He has a dark side. He can't always be the happy go lucky sack of kittens that you want him to be. If he occasionally want's to kill a motherfucker and wreck a city...just shut the fuck up and let him.

He's fucking Super Man!

" I'll give you a reason to cry 'fanboy'. "